Money

After talking about Daniel Suelo, the man who lives in a cave, I started thinking about my own goals in life. Suelo abandoned money because he realized it made people unhealthy and unhappy, and upon thought, I think he's right. Money doesn't make me a happier person at all. I constantly fight with my mom over how much money I owe her and how much she owes me, between my allowance, my paychecks (which she cashes for me), and the money I borrow from her. And I love shopping and acquiring new STUFF. I mean, do I really need it? Does it really make me happy? Well... Probably not. I mean, I feel cute in new clothes, and I love to feel good about myself. But that also just shows how much importance I place on my appearance, which probably isn't so healthy either.

When I tell people I want to be an actress, they often assume it's because I want to be rich and famous. That's not what I want. I want to be known, but not famous. But that's not WHY I want to be an actress. See, people listen to entertainers. From the first moment I got onstage, I realized that the best way to get people to hear what you have to say is by entertaining them. When I act, the words of the playwright and the vision of the director speak through me. I'm a vessel for larger things. My greatest dream is to belong to a theater company like Steppenwolf, where the actors are often writers and directors as well. Because I'm happiest when I'm with others who share my goals. I'm happiest when I'm in the theater, because theaters are where real magic happens. Where actors become people with a need, and the audience becomes a part of that need. The theater is a place for sharing and for learning to empathize with others, and a place to see the world in a different way. And that's the environment I want to spend the rest of my life in.

Kind of a short blog post today... I'm leaving for France on Tuesday (!!!!), and I have tons of homework and packing to do. Au revoir!